You Are My One (And Only)
by Amy-Star
Summary: Sebastian and Blaine's surrogate has a miscarriage and loses their child. Based on the song 'Little Bump' by Ed Sheeran. Warning: Mentions of death of a child and depression.


Sebastian remember how long he's been sitting in this hospital waiting room.

Hours or maybe just minutes. Regardless of the actual measurement of time to him it seemed like forever. He wasn't even dressed properly and his hair was a mess. The hospital phoned right when he got back home from the gym that morning. He dropped everything and rushed over as fast as he could. The conversation itself replaying in his mind over and over again.

_Mr. Anderson-Smythe your surrogate is experiencing complications…_

Sebastian curled his body forward while dragging a hand through his hair.

_We could lose the baby…_

Sebastian's breath came out in a stuttering gasp.

_We recommend that you come to the hospital immediately in case of the worst…_

Sebastian's eyes burned painfully from tears he refuses to shed.

He had to be strong. For whatever outcome he had to be strong.

Sebastian pulled himself back up into a sitting position in the cold metal chair. His eyes caught the nurse's who sat behind the desk gazing at him with concern. He gave a shaky smile and turned his glance away. He tried to focus on his surroundings instead of the situation he was in.

He watches people pass by him through the hospital hallway. The doctors filling out forms at the desk. A mother chasing after her four year old while cradling a baby in her arms. A man with a sprained ankle being helped down the hall to one of the examining rooms. After awhile Sebastian couldn't watched anymore and cradled his head in his hands until the doctor was standing before him.

" -Anderson."

The doctor greeted solemnly and already Sebastian knows.

By the the grim line on the doctor's lips and his tone which he hab forced to be even. Sebastian was excellent at reading people though at the moment he wished he wasn't. He would have given anything for a few more seconds of hope that his child was okay.

!

Sebastian took convincing to have a child. After his spectacularly failed relationship with his own father he had no idea what he could give his child. He wasn't exactly known to be the warm and giving type. He hadn't even wanted a pet let alone be responsible for bringing another human being into the world.

Then he met Blaine.

Or to be more accurate he fell in love with Blaine. The two had met again in Chicago a few years after graduation. Sebastian was there to get a law degree and Blaine was focusing on becoming a music teacher. The two struck up a friendship that led to them becoming best friends and then dating. Sebastian didn't think he would be any good at being someone's boyfriend but with Blaine it was effortless.

Blaine loved kids. He went to work excited every day to teach at a prestigious art school in Chicago. He taught piano lessons to kids under ten on weekends for fun and not because they needed the money. He showered love and affection on his Cooper's twin girls whenever they visited. Blaine was meant to be a father and Sebastian wasn't going to be a person to deny him that. It was for that reason he was convinced the two could make a go at parenting.

Plus he started to imagine what it would be like to have a child. To hold them in his arms. To have a tiny hand reach out to grab his finger. To watch them as they slept peacefully. To see Blaine's eyes and smile on their child. He'd be so careful with that child.

They had done everything right. They did the research and took their time going into it. They looked at countless profiles for egg donors. Interviewed several surrogates before picking the right one. Everything had been done with care and attention.

So why? Why did everything have to fail? They just had four months to go. Four months their child would have been born. Now everything had fallen apart.

!

Sebastian walked down the hallway to a more private corner. He stood there for several minutes starring at his cellphone. His thumb hovered over the number two button which was the speed-dial he had for Blaine's cellphone. His husband had been volunteering today at a local production of Westside Story. He was probably still there.

Finally Sebastian pushed down on the button and waited.

After two rings someone picked up.

"Baby! How are you?"

Sebastian cringed at the happy tone in Blaine's voice. Knowing that he would be the one to take it away from him in a matter of minutes.

"Hey," Sebastian breathed out, "Could you go somewhere quiet? I need to tell you something."

"Oh okay," Blaine's voice was filled with concern, "What's going on? You sound off to me."

"Blaine please," Sebastian tried hard not to break down, "I need you to go somewhere private."

"Give me a moment," Blaine's worried voice replied.

Soon the background noise of people chattering and building set pieces faded away. Sebastian assumed Blaine had walked further into the theater. In the deserted wings that no one went to.

"Now tell me whats going on."

Sebastian swallowed thickly before speaking.

"The doctor phoned me today," Sebastian choked out, "It was about the baby…"

"What about the baby?" Blaine sounded scared now.

"There was a complication," Sebastian pressed a hand to his forehead trying to remember exactly what the doctor said but he couldn't recall anything.

"What kind of complication? Is he okay?"

Sebastian couldn't speak the words out but Blaine understood.

A raw and choked sob reached Sebastian. And it broke his heart.

He could hear Blaine repeat the word 'no' over and over again. He could imagine Blaine's face crumbling as he cried. Normally Sebastian would wish he could be there to hold his husband. To whisper words of comfort and wrap his arms around him. However he knew that nothing could lessen the pain Blaine was going through. Nothing could make this okay.

!

It was two months after losing their first child that they talked about trying again.

Those were the worst two months of Sebastian's life.

The two of them couldn't shake off the void that had been left behind. No matter how hard they tried neither could understand why their child had been taken. The two moved through their daily lives numb to each other. Both of them retreated into their own pain.

For Sebastian he couldn't stop staring at the ultrasound they had saved on the computer. To hear the sound of their child's steady heart beat. His fingers reaching out to touch the screen in attempt to touch.

After awhile things got easier. The two of them started talking and acknowledging the other. They went to therapy where they cried and raged and mourned their loss. Soon it became easier to come to terms with. Suddenly Sebastian couldn't stand dealing with everything alone anymore. He couldn't allow his relationship with Blaine to slip away. He already lost one person in his life he didn't want to lose another.

You could say it was hope that got them through it. Hope that their marriage was strong enough to withstand this. Hope that when Sebastian reached out to his husband in search of comfort that Blaine would be there. Hope that Sebastian could be the one to help Blaine get through the bad days. Hope that a chance to have a family together wasn't forever lost.

Sebastian felt a sense of guilt when they agreed to try again. As if they were betraying their first child by trying to replace them. However the two had come to terms that while they would never forget the child they lost that didn't meant they couldn't strive to be happy.

Eight tortuous months later the two held their daughter in their arms.

Blaine's tears were pressed into his shoulder. Tears of sadness for the child they never got to hold. Tears of happiness for their child they were blessed with. Sebastian wrapped his arms around Blaine's arms and held him tightly. Telling him silently that he understood completely.

"What should we name her?" Blaine's fingers gently caressed their daughter's cheek.

Sebastian stared at the tiny baby and was amazed by how perfect she was. She's soft and warm and alive. His heart swelled with a love that was indescribable. His green eyes shifted over to Blaine's eyes and saw the same thing in those golden depths.

Sebastian leaned forward to kiss his husband softly on the lips. Blaine smile up at him and it made Sebastian's heart ache. Sebastian had feared he would never see his husband that happy again. He couldn't begin to put into words how precious it was to see that smile. The both of them had wondered if they were capable of smiling again. In that moment Sebastian knew they would be okay.

He turned back to their daughter and cradled her sleeping form even more protectively.

"Hope," He told his husband, "I think her name should be Hope."

**A/N:** Sorry if some of you feel if the ending is a cop out. I just needed there to be some happiness when dealing with this subject matter ;_;


End file.
